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Month

February 2015

Valentine’s Day for spinsters

darcyI love Valentine’s Day. If you know me, then you know I adore Jane Austen, worship Nora Ephron and have pinup tendencies that are not to be ignored.

 

So Valentine’s Day is a holiday I naturally embrace, despite being perpetually single.

I try to send Valentine’s cards to people every year, and really, I’m more fond of this tradition than I am of sending Christmas cards.

This year I bought blank, recycled cards and made my own, unique cards for each person. It was a great excuse to have craft nights.

I also (finally) had enough income to have a sweet treat delivered to people I appreciate. I have cupcakes delivered from Cako to two of the offices I worked in last year. It was my way of saying thanks and just knowing that it was a surprise for people made my day. Sure, I’d love to horde the cupcakes for myself, but knowing that others had a pick-me-up made me happy.

So yes, I am cheesy about at least one holiday. I’m shameless about my affection for heart-shaped anythings, and I’m happy to share that with other people during this time of year.

Don’t let Valentine’s Day become a thing that makes you feel bad about being single, or stresses you out about gift-giving. Own it as a day to celebrate love in all its abstract forms, not just romantic.

Also, dream of Mr. Darcy.

Career Shower!

When I landed my adult job that successfully put me on my career path I threw myself a Career Shower.

careershower

What is that? It’s just like a Wedding Shower or Baby Shower, but for my career. It’s a way to supply my home and home office with the necessities I needed when I moved away.

It really just consisted of me registering at Target (wedding registry, because Target doesn’t yet have a category for celebrating my own success) and having a farewell dinner.

I made the decisions a long while ago to not have babies or get married. (I’ve had people argue that I may get married one day, but since I’ve prioritized my career I won’t be getting married soon. I feel even more validated in having a shower now, when I’m starting off and trying to get settled, than when I’m older and will probably have enough money to provide my home with simple things like lamps and plates.)

My career is my baby. Think of it that way if it helps.

I’ve given my career YEARS of love, money and mostly tears. I think I’ve spent more time on my career than most people do planning a wedding or a family.

(Cue sounds of a gauntlet being thrown.)

I’ve had numerous people argue this, but the fact remains that the society I live in still doesn’t accept the life-choices of young career-driven ladies as easily as it does men.

I want Career Showers to become the norm. I want society to celebrate female success that doesn’t involve a baby or a spouse.

I’ve been told that Sex and the City tackles the career-woman issue in much the same way. Carrie has a friend with a baby that just doesn’t respect her life decisions in the same way she respects that woman’s family planning choices. It’s sad that not much has changed since the episode aired in 2003.

And I totally took note of the people who didn’t contribute to my shower. Those people aren’t getting shit for their weddings or babies.

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